Ignoring field court for the moment, AJs work in "The Big House." BTLs intermittently work The Big House and then retreat to their offices. AJs have a parade of lawyers and citizens who stand before them daily pitching their spiels trying to convince the AJ what to do. BTLs perform their spiel then go back and figure out what spiel might work tomorrow. Being a BTL can be a lonely experience. BTLs have partners, associates, secretaries and clients. However, their interactions are typically brief and often broken up by lengthy periods of time where they have to read, prepare or draft. AJs probably see more judges, lawyers and citizens in a day than BTLs do in a week. On the other hand, an AJ’s "call" can be very, very repetitive. Same lawyers, same spiels, different day. I’ll call it a tie in the category of "Daily Circuses."

Most of you will say that this is a no brainer. But stop, I know some AJs who work much harder than some lawyers I know. The problem is, those lawyers are not BTLs. To be a BTL you not only have to be bright, experienced, talented and charismatic, you also have to relentlessly work your kiester off. AJs might work hard, but they do get those holidays off and they even take vacations. Okay, okay, AJs win.

AJs can be friends with other judges and lawyers, if they like. BTLs have lawyer friends and probably a few judge friends, as well. However, it might be easier for an AJ to become friends with a lawyer than it is for a BTL to become friends with a judge. Both AJs and BTLs should also have some friends who are neither lawyers nor judges. In the end, how many comrades you have depends on YOU. No blood here.

At first blush, most people would say that AJs have more prestige. There certainly is the initial glow when a lawyer becomes a judge. It’s hard to determine whether that derives more from all the congratulations from family, friends and peers or from the relief of leaving all those darn files behind. In general, judges are well respected. Rightfully so; they’ve earned it.

BTLs are respected by their peers and hopefully their families, friends and clients. Nevertheless, we’ve all heard plenty of stupid lawyer jokes. I once threw a cheese cube at a relative for one too many stupid lawyer jokes. He got the message. Then, after I saved his rump from a bad real estate deal, I didn’t hear any more lawyer jokes. Clients really respect lawyers when they need us. Unfortunately, as Joe Mirabella has been heard to say, "Your client can turn on you like a cobra in a pit." Not that AJs don’t have their own concerns. Like any referee, once they’ve made the call, whether right or not, somebody is going to be upset. Even so, AJs win the "respect category."

Whoop-it-up is derived from what was known as "Fort Whoop-Up" (officially known as Fort Hamilton in Alberta, Canada), which received this nickname because it was a whiskey trading post in the late 1800s. Although the sale of whiskey was then outlawed, Fort Hamilton had "whoop-up bandits" who sold "whoop-up bug juice," a highly prized alcohol spiked with ginger, molasses, red pepper and colored with black chewing tobacco. The hangovers must have been horrific. Currently, you can attend "Whoop-Up Days" during the last five days of any August in Lethbridge, Alberta, the original site of Fort Hamilton. Over 67,000 people attended in 2006. See, Wikipedia: The Free Encyclopedia (www.wikipedia.org).

Lawyers and judges have a tremendous amount of responsibility and stress. A few whoop-up days here and there helps. Maybe President-Elect Fred Spitzzeri should sponsor a bench/bar whoop-up weekend next August. We might even throw in some MCLE, like "The Etiquette of Proper Whooping." If we added "Avoiding Whooping Addictions" it might even qualify for professional responsibility credit. Call Fred at (630) 922-5858 and tell him "I want to join the whooping trip."

In general, AJs have to be more careful about their whooping than BTLs. Judges are public figures and with the respect comes greater scrutiny. Those judges who might want to whoop-it-up should consider doing so with other whooping judges and maybe leave the state for some good whooping. That way, you avoid any whoop-whistleblowers. Just bring back a good whooped-up story. BTLs should also be careful about their public whooping but seemingly not as much as judges. An occasional whoop or two by a BTL might actually enhance the BTL’s reputation. It shows that the BTL is not stoic and has some flair. For what it’s worth, BTLs win here; they have more whoopability than AJs.

You must decide for yourself. At his swearing in ceremony, recently appointed Associate Judge John Panagasser said that he was ingrained from youth by his father, an Italian immigrant, that being a lawyer is the greatest profession you can have. . . "then you be a judge." Becoming a judge was John’s calling. It’s who he is and, more importantly, who he always has been. John also was a very good BTL. All else interested, please take note.

Robe for robe, we have the best and brightest County Judiciary in the State of Illinois and beyond. They are a very talented and progressive group. Just look at those efficiency ratings. More than that, their integrity is unsurpassed. They are fair, independently minded and unbiased to the core. We should all be very thankful.

Don’t forget to sign up for the MEGA MEGA Meeting and State of the Courthouse address by Chief Judge Jorgensen, which is on January 20, 2007 at the Lisle/Naperville Hilton.

Judge’s Nite auditions begin now. There’s still room for you to have the time of your life and thrust yourself into the bosom of the DCBA by being a part of this year’s show. No talent required. "Just call Susan" (630) 645-2295.

Every year flies by faster than the last. My goals for 2007 include fearless leadership to you, not committing malpractice, spending more evenings at home with my family and having the word "whoopability" acknowledged in Wikipedia. Have yourself a BTL year!

FN1 This President’s Page is for amusement and discussion purposes only.

No reference is made herein to any living judge or lawyer and this document

shall not be used on trial of any cause, especially mine.

FN2 Please note that the above definition of "Gaffney’s Whoopability" suggests nothing illicit, just good ol’ fashion fun.

FN3 If this President’s Page isn’t controversial enough yet, it is now.